Racism review...review

So, as some of you may know, I am currently making huge strides academically.  Several credits away from an MA, I am now starting to run a pilot study which will, hopefully, become my thesis.  I am studying the concept of modern racism.  I don't just study it, I live it.  I watch the documentaries, I practice what research has shown to reduce prejudice, I read the articles, I am constantly soaking up everything I can in order to surpass the expectation of a well-deserved grade.  I want this to be my life.  Research has already made clear that the problem exists, hypothesized the origins of the issue, and shown evidence of the enormous toll it is taking on minority races in this country.  My thesis-my life-brings about those actions, thought patterns and motivation that society needs in order to move forward.  Kenneth B. Clark, a prominent researcher in Psychology, made enormous impacts during the anti-segregation movement.  In the late 1980's, the frail, yet sharp man made a statement that will forever be embedded in my head:  he mentioned that this country did in fact desegregate schools, however, schools are still very much segregated (take a minute).  He did mention that there is hope for true equality.  All it takes, he suggested, is self-respect and motivation.
I wanted to quickly introduce just some of what consumes my mind everyday as well as promote one of the most powerful organizations I have come across thus far in my journey.  Racism Review sends their newsletters daily, that only scratch the surface of what these people find everyday in this country.  If nothing else, just take a quick glance at the website, you're not required to sign up.  However, should you sign up, a.  let me know and b. I promise an eye-opening experience.  Peace and love.

Personality: picking up the pieces

A simple, yet essential concept in Psychology was brought to my attention by one of my professors.  Being that personality is strictly a construct, separate from behavior, and cannot be seen nor analyzed.  This is because of the fact that, just because we act a certain way, we simply are playing roles.  Humans have a persona to put on according to the situation we find ourselves in but, until a person truly gets through to you, begins to understand you, we can never assume we know anything about another human beings personality.
Once the personality is fully developed, the only way we and other humans we encounter can ever see our personality is when we experience a psychological break down.  Perhaps this can be attributed to my ever decreasing contact with the general public.   While by the age of 26, I should be well on my way to stabilizing my personality--becoming the person I am going to be, for the rest of my existence, I am all of about 9 years behind.

While a lot of those poor individuals experiencing physical trauma (being that of abuse, starvation, etc) tend to have stunted bodily growth, it has also become clear that psychological trauma tends to stunt mental growth.  While chronologically, I (unfortunately) cannot stop the years from adding up, I am behind those my age in terms of maturity and coping skills--in a way.  It has been almost 9 years to the day that I so suddenly lost my brother--and the events that followed still haunt me to this day.  I plan on taking more time to delve into discovering the events leading up to this day-uprooting memories repressed, analyzing how it is I am the person I am today, that which drives me to get on with my life-to do whatever it takes to follow my passion, and how just months ago I came to realize that, when I hear the front door open, it is not, nor will it ever again be, John.